Coffee Party

Strange thing happened today. I was in my room when my paintbrush rang!
I found myself wondering whether I should pick it up or not because mom said I only have permission to answer my tennis shoes, but I decided to take the risk. A familiar voice said:

What is the root of three thousand and ninety seven times eight?
Huh... Well, I don't know! I'm in the arts business!
Well, alright then, would you come to my Coffee Party?
Alice? Is that you? What about the Mad Hater's Tea Party?
Tea is so last year and I am more of a coffee person myself. I think you could use a coffee break so I decided to call you on your paintbrush.
I though paintbrushes didn't ring!
Well they didn't but if I called you on your shoes it would make your ear dirty and I can't have dirty people in my Coffee Party. Besides, that way we have have colorful conversations!
Great, should I take something with me?
Yes, please bring some broccoli
Why the hell do we need broccoli? Isn't it a COFFEE Party?
Yes but you see, we're trying to innovate here. Who created the rules for Coffee Parties anyway? I can bring whatever I want! I can bring my brother Raphael if I want to!
But... Bringing a person is normal, that is what parties are for, for people to enjoy themselves! Why shouldn't you bring your brother? It's normal!
What if my brother Raphael is a broccoli?
You're brother Raphael isn't a broccoli, that would make YOU a broccoli too and you know you are NOT a broccoli.
Well now I'll declare myself one, and you will come to my party and bring ME broccoli because I said so or else I'll serve you green tea.
Nah!
YES!
Okay I'll bring your damn broccolli.